30 days past due.
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Summer 2014. Greatest Hits. So far.
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- ‘Merica.
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- I fell. But I’m ok.
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- I believe the youngsters call this a “selfie.” How original.
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- Speed-O’s? In Vermont. He must be from Quebec.
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- Hydrating Dad’s co-workers.
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- When a stranger throws you a free hot dog from the back of a moving truck, you gobble it down. Right, Matt?
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- Me & Gramma.
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- This isn’t my belly, it’s a fuel tank for awesomeness that runs on pork rinds.
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- Every kid has a proverbial Aunt Clara.
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- Not the first time I’ve had worms.
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- Swammin’ lessons.
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- Between two hundred ferns.
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- Accelerate out of the turn.
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- Ssslllerp.
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- Sliding and farting. It’s a skill that requires practice.
The Rodeo.
Airports.
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- That one. Let’s hijack that one.
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- ¿Fuego?
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- You thinkin’ what I’m thinkin’?
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- You know how sometimes Jesus appears in tortillas? Similar thing happens with Dad’s scars.
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- NuhDerrrrrrrrrrrr….
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- Pretend like you don’t even see it, then go steal it.
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- Where’s my BB gun?
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- Bust out the marshmallows.
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- Mom’s not afraid of balloons, but balloon Carnies rather.
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- Having second thoughts.
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- Heck yes I went airborne.
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- Next stop, Mexico.
Scrapin’ to get by.
Sweet Virginia.
Vows were exchanged. Animals were fed. Seer was sucked.
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- A good ol’ Southern duel. I demand satisfaction.
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- Hey chickens.
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- So then I says to Mom, “Wrecked ’em? Darn near killed ’em! Get it?”
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- Don’t try to tell ME how to lick a face.
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- Hold tight, fair damsel.
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- Speed is my middle name.
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- Should I? Yes, I should.
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- Milk comes from where?
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- Here comes Liam. Liam Stowe.
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- This suit was built for speed. Same as this body.
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- Jailbreak. Tonight. Midnight.
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- Come at me, bro. Come at me.
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- I feed you, you feed me. Circle of life.
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- You tell me, Dad. What part do the McNuggets come from?
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- I’m out.
A new pet.
I call him “Wormy.”
Water you looking at?
Image
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- What’s our plan? We gotta have a plan. How can you say there’s no plan?
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- Lotsa pipes up in here.
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- Is he still back there? Cuz if he doesn’t stop staring he’s gonna get some knuckles in sandwich form.
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- Makin’ it rain.
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- Chicks dig a daredevil.
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- Wait, people do what in this water? I’ve already ingested about a gallon.
Free bird.
This probably seems weird unless you’re familiar with what Dad does for money. Actually, that makes it seem even more weird.
Snow + Girls.
Image
H. E. Double hockey sticks Yes.
Look at me. Look at me.
I’m the Captain now.
The holiday highlight reel
Holiday sampler
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- Totally fooled Santa into thinking I’m nice.
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- What to disassemble first…
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- This tree’s head will go above my mantle.
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- I hitch a ride while Mom drags the kill.
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- Shredding the gnar.
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- Drill baby, drill.
My gift to you is my awesomeness.
You’re welcome.
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